Category Archives: Stream of Thought

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I just remembered. I watched Agents of Shield yesterday, the season 2 episode where Trip dies and I noticed something. I know it’s probably old news but up until now I always thought Trip died because he was in the chamber. Nobody not inhuman should have been there, so it tried to put him through metamorphis and obviously it failed.

BUT that’s not what happened at all.

Daisy started to get the chrysalis shell and reached out to Trip as she was understandably frightened. Trip desperate to help her smashed the crystals with one hell of a leg kick. Even then he probably would have been fine, there was another puff of smoke like at the start, but he had crystals embedded in his chest, and that was game over.

So it wasn’t that he was in the chamber – it was that he kicked the crystals and got impaled by them. He could have lived if only the crystals missed him when he did that awesome kick.

I miss him 🙁

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Last night I dreamt a lot (very common thing) but part of the dream was a damn stress nightmare about forgetting to invite someone to the NaNo cabin!

Seriously I dreamt that I got a facebook message from Howard the Duck yelling at me for having forgotten to invite them.

This would be funny if it hadn’t felt so horrible at the time. I think this decides it, I’m not going to re-up, I don’t need the stress in my life. I’m not going to be a NaNo ML anymore. Like I don’t worry about you guys yelling at me, but the people in my region are very demanding. Running the Rumbelle cabin is ok, but the one for my region? No.

To be honest I should have already known this as I ran a regional NaNo cabin last year, and last year I tried to post random daily facts everyday in an attempt to keep the cabin active. Well my regional cabin was a ghost-town EXCEPT on the one day I didn’t post the facts, because then there was a post complaining about the fact that I’d missed a day.

Seriously they are mean. I’m not doing it anymore. Last time.

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jackabelle73

Discussion prompt for Rumbelle fandom: if Rumple & Belle were the same age, would they even be Rumbelle? Asking a different way, if you read a non-magic AU fic in which they were the same age, would that work for you? How much of what makes them Rumbelle, is due to the age difference?

I guess it’s a matter of personal opinion, like asking people why they ship a certain thing. There are several distinct qualities that make up the Rumbelle relationship. I guess it’s about what personally you were drawn to and so therefore what’s important to you.

For me the age difference is irrelevant. I usually minimise it in fics (making it more like 10 years) because what makes Rumbelle to me has nothing to do with the age difference.

What makes the Rumbelle relationship is Belle and Rumple’s distinct characters and then how they work together. For instance Rumple’s self-loathing, the fact that he’s a father and how much he has absorbed that love for his child into his identity, or indeed love for his family – that is imo what motivates him always. Then there’s Belle, headstrong, tendency to jump in without thinking, always sees the best in people, she has a deep desire to prove herself and to do something that matters – to be a hero.

Then together they have a love of learning. They can spark off one another intellectually. Belle’s positivity vs. Rumple’s pessimism, he’ll provide caution when she needs it and she’ll give him the push he needs to actually take risks. They both have huge hearts but Rumple is more guarded because he’s been hurt before. He’ll never be as outgoing as Belle can be sometimes, but he’s happy to be a homebody and the stay-at-home dad, while Belle saves the world. Then they have nice quiet time together at home, the comfortable silence where they are enjoying being together and also reading.

None of that, none of what makes Rumbelle the relationship I love so much, draws much on the age difference. Sure it’s something to explore, it gives Rumple an added reason for why Belle deserves ‘better’. I guess there’s also the potential of a power imbalance because of the age difference. I always argue that it’s not there because Belle is an equal partner. That could provide conflict though as it’s worked out. That’s not a vital part of Rumbelle to me though. That’s not what the core of the relationship is, it’s just an added something.

Does that make sense? and wow I do not know how to be succinct I’m sorry.

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anonymous  asked:

A Twist in the Story: You’re not a writer but an artist in this event! And you made a cover art and a comic-like piece! I thought it’s the first time we see your art in comic book style (is it?). Why did you choose this style? 🙂

Hey anon, wow what a nice message to wake up to! Thank you 🙂

Ok I’ll try not to go on (but I usually do *rolls eyes at self*). I chose the comic book style for two reasons:
1) It was a Big Bang! The event lasted what six months? and deserved a big piece and a large amount of effort. Doing this cover + comic easily took me 40+ hours. I know a veteran artist would think that insane as they could probably do it in like an hour or something but I’m still learning and had to redo parts several times and idk I’m just slow.
2) It was the easiest way for me to illustrate the story. I’m not a sketcher unfortunately and so the organised ‘illustrate this scene’ worked much better for my brain.

I have actually had a stab at the comic book layout before for the 2018 Fitzsimmons Secret Valentine exchange (click for art). As you can see if you clicked it’s embarrassingly awful … actually well yeah it’s still embarrassing and awful but everyone has to start somewhere right? I feel bad for the person that was my partner. I did work very hard on that drawing, a lot of sweat and tears, but yeah it’s bad, I was still figuring things out re: style and hadn’t learned not to mix techniques. I wouldn’t blame my partner for looking at it and feeling cheated, and wishing that they’d a partner who produced something of quality.

I wasn’t a writer in the Big Bang for two reasons again:
1) We had far more writers than artists, especially to begin with, and so to help with matching I refrained from throwing my hat into the ring as a writer.
2) I’m struggling with words right now and I was afraid to sign up in case I didn’t follow through. Part of me regrets that as I have always responded better to external deadlines but (see reason #1) meant it wasn’t really an option anyway.

Also I guess I wanted to do art because I actively want to improve. I watch videos and read tutorials etc. but none of that is worth a damn without practice. If I don’t spend time drawing then I’ll never get better. I know it’s cruel really to inflict my practising on people in an exchange but I really do put a lot of effort in and I guess I hope that counts for something /shrug.

Each drawing I do I try and analyse what went wrong so I have a target to try and improve in future. I know I’m weak on likeness and I also feel like my drawings have no soul, lack of emotion, they are too static. I have been researching that and something I’m going to try in future is camera position, so to speak. I don’t think I frame the drawings very well, I don’t get a good angle or gah I don’t even know the words.

Anyway watch this space. There will hopefully be more comic layout art in future and well hopefully more art in general 🙂

aaaaaand I went on /facepalm I knew I would, I mean get real it’s me, I always ramble like crazy, I’m sorry.

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I just added a lot of Fitzsimmons gifsets to my queue and now I have feelings all over again.

Does anyone else get busy, or start watching something else, and then on return it’s like “man I love this so much! how did I forget? why did I take a break?”

Honestly sometimes I try and take breaks on purpose because of that renewed surge of love. It keeps things from getting stale.

WIP Wednesday

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Is this still a thing? Idk.

For me I feel like this has devolved into me rambling and talking about doing things a lot, but then never actually doing them, and then just giving lots of excuses as to why. That’s not what I want this to be but that’s where I’m at right now. So acknowledgement, this is the bad place, it is what it is and I’m sorry.

Moving on!

I read a really cool article today – Three Simple rules for writing good to-do tasks – and I looked at my to-do list, and then at the list of ‘bad examples’ and did a massive /facepalm because yes this is what my list looked like.

To be succinct I was writing tasks as like ‘write AMR fic’ which should be a project because that has sooooo many micro-tasks in it, like plan the fic, draft it, edit it, and that doesn’t even take into account how long it takes because writing will be multiple sessions.

I’m a Pavlov person, I like ticking things off lists, I like the whoosh of a ‘level up’, it’s little wonder I get addicted to games like Warcraft where you can systematically get that hit with a ding on a frequent basis.

So my to do list might be helping me not forget stuff but it’s not helping me actually do it. I mean I look at the list and just ignore it. So I know, I know, it’s like yet another ‘productivity system’ idea which will probably do absolutely nothing to motivate my lazy ass but hey, anything is worth a try right? It might help, it might not, but I won’t know unless I give it a go and here’s the kicker – I need something to change. I’m not achieving anything right now, I’m not writing, I’m not drawing, I’m not reading (*cries* there’s so much fic I want to read), I’m struggling to even do the basics of living like feeding myself.

Ok so on the new and improved written list I have this months drawing project, a secret Rumbelle thing 🙂 🙂 and this months AMR prompt “don’t fall in love” for which I have a couple of notes on my phone, some swirling ideas in my brain and nothing else.

I have 11 days according to my deadline on the to-do app. Let’s see if I can actually manage it this time *rolls eyes at self*

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I just went to make coffee and the hot water is broken and there’s no way I’m paying for a cup *hisses* “it’s a traaaaap”

*is a cheapskate*

*is grumpy*

It’s not the caffiene it’s the warmth, I find it comforting and I have the stupid lecture today 🙁 oh and I know I said I wouldn’t whine on here anymore *sniggers* mmm that resolution didn’t last 2 minutes did it? /sigh

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mariequitecontrarie  asked:

What are you thinking about?

Well I just answered a question and I’m feeling a bit self-conscious about it so that…

That’s kinda boring though haha.

Erm I don’t want to get extensional about this though as delving into my brain is never a good place to go. So I’m thinking that it’s got dark and I should pull the curtains and turn the light on. I’m thinking that maybe tonight I’ll watch Killjoys or the Librarians. I really should watch Black Lightning because I do like it, it’s just rewatching stuff I love is comforting, watching new things requires brainpower because I have to think about it and remember everything that came before and put it in context and make connections and add details to the characters biographies that I keep in my head and also think about the timeline (especially if there are flashbacks) and – watching new TV is exhausting!

Seriously this is why I haven’t started season 4 of Warehouse 13 yet. I got waaaaay too invested in HG and Myka and the way season 3 ended I just know it’s going to be huge and I just haven’t felt able to commit to the mental and emotional energy it’ll require.

This reminds me of a Librarians episode where Cassandra talks about working out the size of the sets based on the height of the actors and some other variables, and she looks at Ezekiel and says “doesn’t everyone do that?” and he is just ??? NO and so I’m thinking maybe maintaining the lore wiki for each and every show I love isn’t normal either. On the other hand if I ever need to write fic I have all the details in my head and don’t need to look much up.

It’s not even like I want to do it. Sometimes I think of my mind as being like a rack of servers and I despair at how much space must be taken up with all this TV trivia. I don’t remember it on purpose. I don’t know how to switch it off, that’s just the way I am.

Aaaaaand this got super long, seriously self? Sorry my brain is “like a bag of cats. you can smell crazy” :p

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mariequitecontrarie  asked:

Tell me a secret.

That’ll be rather difficult I don’t think I have any.

Like literally I am the WORST at keeping secrets. Whenever I do something wrong, rather than just hide it like a regular person, I immediately go and confess even if there is zero chance anyone would find out. People always know what I’m getting for them as gifts because I have no subtlety, no patience and ask things like “would you like x?” because I can’t wait to know – I can’t even keep good secrets!

The one secret I can remember keeping recently (as in a year or so ago) was to do with a trip for my mum that her husband organised. He told me, and told me he would be very upset if I told and it tormented me. I don’t want to keep secrets from my mum and I wasn’t 100% sure it was a good secret because I know her and know she doesn’t like surprises. However fear of repercussions did ensure I kept my mouth shut. The moment it was over I told mum that I never wanted to be in that position again, I was absolutely adamant that in future I did not want to know!

So yeah me and secrets.

On the other hand I am very good at keeping confidences. Like literally you can tell me anything without concern, I would never betray you … unless it involves my mum. I really don’t like keeping anything from her, I really think she’d prefer to know.

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Colds are gross. I’m knackered. Like I’m not really sick, it’s not anything to complain about, it’s just low-level draining ickiness. I know it sounds crazy but this kind of in-between sickness is the worst. Not sick enough to have an excuse not to do stuff but am sick enough that everything just sucks. Does that even make sense?

Anyway changing the subject!

I have officially chosen my classes for next year. Won’t learn until August whether I got my choice or not but hey the form is submitted, that is certainly a load off my mind.

In less personal news been rewatching some season 1 Killjoys. Like I know, can see, that they were always heading into the “war against the green” but I do miss the original premise, the simple “bounty hunters in space” where they had warrants and missions. I’m attached to the characters and I love the show, I’m just saying I would have liked more “warrant is all” stuff.

Anyway it’s Saturday and I’m going to have a duvet day. I really am knackered.