*blushes furiously* I … I might … I might have sort of already … I could never show him! I know that he’s always been so nice about my paintings. When he showed me *shivers* well I now know that I’m painting what I intend. However, everything else that I’ve painted I saw before the accident. All I have is how Nick’s face felt, when he let me map his features with my hands. What if I got it horribly wrong? I don’t want to offend him …
(OOC: Don’t worry 🙂 Gold will see that painting one day)
Oh Nick wouldn’t want to do that. I’m sure that would be really boring for him. I know I would only make a mess of whatever I was trying to paint, I’d be so self-conscious. Besides my art is private, especially the unfinished pieces.
Synopsis: Belle French lives alone and she likes it that way. She’s lived alone ever since the terrible car accident which killed her mother and claimed her eyesight. Belle spends her days painting, in complete solitude, until one day she wakes up and hears movement outside. Somebody has moved into the cottage next door. She had grown comfortable in her solitary existence until Mr Gold crashes into her life. Now her future is uncertain, like a blank canvas, waiting for her to apply the paint and decide what kind of story she is creating.
Note: Banner by the awesomely amazing @rowofstars who has very kindly and patiently beta read this chapter. Thank you so much! In this chapter there’s a prompt from @rowofstars for a reenactment of the deleted mirror scene from Skin Deep. This fic was voted TEA Best Drama and I’m still utterly overwhelmed and so grateful for the support. Thank you all! I hope that you enjoy this chapter! 🙂
Time alone,
after something happened, was Belle’s enemy. Her head became a very dangerous
place and she couldn’t run from herself. She was afraid of her own mind, and
the negative spiral of thoughts she couldn’t escape. Sometimes it was hard to
remember a time when this hadn’t been her life. Still, despite the lack of
conflict for the last couple of years, Belle knew how best to manage it. She
had to try and distract herself enough that her subconscious could process what
happened, so that by the time she consciously thought about it again, her brain
didn’t proceed to torment her.
That was the
idea anyway. Everyone needed time to process events, it just took her longer
than it did for other people. Not wanting to be alone with her own thoughts was
why she had clung to Nick and asked him to come for dinner. Neither of them had
been in the right frame of mind for company, and that had proved disastrous.
Belle was fairly sure it ranked in the top five of the worst days of her life.
Their talk the morning after had been more positive but just as monumental, and
that time Belle hadn’t made a mistake. They’d finished their tea, and parted on
good terms and that was enough.
Baby steps. I’m glad that they’ve decided to make a change but also that they’re taking it slowly. I think that Belle certainly is a very impulsive character and tends to jump into things, and then ends up overloading herself and being back at square one, or worse. They’re treading very carefully and considering the issues they both have, that’s the best way. I’m really enjoying watching these two unfold and trust each other more and more. 🙂
Yup that’s Belle all over and she knows that about herself, so she’s trying hard to keep herself in check. With this slow is the only way to go because fast would be a mistake and I want them to have a happy ending, well a happy ending of sorts. This was a happy chapter, nothing broke, but we’ll have to see what happens next. With things like this it does tend to be two steps forward, one step back. I’m glad you liked it! Thank you so much for commenting 🙂
*sighs heavily* I don’t know. Is it possible for a person to fundamentally change, especially at his age? I mean he’s halfway through his life, his behavior is pretty entrenched. Look I’m not saying my dad is a bad person, or that he has bad intentions. It just all gets screwed up.
I know him better than anyone else. I think he probably wants things to be different, for things to be better, but then he’s been wanting that for years. I kinda blackmailed him to go on this sabbatical as I figured maybe a big external change would force things, and give him the opportunity to make different choices. If he can’t work for three months, then he has to fill the void somehow right? Then maybe he’ll learn that there’s more to life than work. Maybe he’ll learn to make time for us, rather than just writing cheques.
You can probably tell I’ve discussed this with Emma a lot right? Emma reckons dad won’t change until he’s ready, and I guess I agree with that. What kinda hurts though, is that I needed him to change a long time ago and he never did. You know what is really screwed up? Part of me doesn’t even want him to change now, because it means that I wasn’t worth changing for when I was a kid. I haven’t even told Emma that, but she probably knows. She knows all the crazy stuff in my head before I do half the time.
Synopsis: Belle French lives alone and she likes it that way. She’s lived alone ever since the terrible car accident which killed her mother and claimed her eyesight. Belle spends her days painting, in complete solitude, until one day she wakes up and hears movement outside. Somebody has moved into the cottage next door. She had grown comfortable in her solitary existence until Mr Gold crashes into her life. Now her future is uncertain, like a blank canvas, waiting for her to apply the paint and decide what kind of story she is creating.
Note: Banner by the awesomely amazing @rowofstars who has very kindly and patiently beta read this chapter. Thank you so much!
When Gold woke
up, it was to the disturbing fact that he didn’t remember falling asleep. His
head was pounding, and his mouth tasted like something had died in it. That
would be the whiskey on all counts. It took him a moment to realize that the
noise reverberating around his skull, wasn’t just his headache, the phone was
ringing. Wincing, Gold pulled himself up from where he had been drooling into
his pillow, his hand grasping for the phone on the side table.
“What?” Gold
barked.
He regretted it
a second later, as his head throbbed anew and his gut churned. He hated
hangovers, this was why he usually never had more than a couple of drinks. He
couldn’t understand paying for the privilege of feeling this awful. However,
last night had been a special case. He’d tossed back the expensive whiskey like
water, wanting to block out Belle calling for him, and to stop the ache in his
heart. He’d just wanted to forget.
MY BABIES! I think this is the most they have talked things out yet and it feels so good. This was a joy to read and I’m excited for where they go from here even though I know it’s a long road. They’ve already changed each other just by their existence. Gold’s understanding towards Belle seems to have renewed her faith in people being decent and maybe accepting her. Belle’s sweetness and vulnerability calls to Gold in a way that makes him curious about her but also want to protect her. I know that can be shaky ground to start a relationship on, but they have so much potential to further help and change each other if they are brave enough to pursue it.
Heh well it is slow burn. Jumping into a relationship would be a mistake, of course Belle does like to run before she can walk. Anyway, yeah they talked over recent events, which will put them in a much better place to move forward. They are both now ready to try and move forward, which is a huge step and a turning point for them. Thank you so much for all your support! I’m really glad you are enjoying the fic 🙂
*basically almost trips self trying to get to comments*
OHHHHHH MYYYYYY GAAAAAAAAWWWWWWDDDDDDDD
*SCREAMING*
DUDE.
DUDE.
THE BABIES ARE TAAAAAAAAAAAALKIIIIIIIIIIIINGGGGGGGG <3 <3 <3 <3
OHHHHHH THEY’RE MAKING SO MUCH PROGRESS!!!!! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!
(in other news, i gave you props on one of your other fics here, and i’m writing it about it on this post cause Tumblr’s being a shitlord and won’t let me properly link you, and thought you’d like to see it <3)
I-CAN’T-EVEN-WITH-THESE-FEELS-MAN OUT OF TEN
Hehe I love your gifs. Thank you so much! Your enthusiasm always puts a smile on my face. I’m so glad you enjoyed it! Yup they are talking, communication is good. Thanks again! 🙂
I knew there was something I’d forgotten to read last night. I’m so glad that they’re back on the same page now. But oh my word, all through their conversation I was practically screaming at them to stop getting the wrong end of the stick and just let the other talk! I think that’s a flaw of Belle’s that carries through into this AU very well, that she will always jump in with both feet and start making assumptions, and Rumple/Gold’s appalling timing has again carried across well.
I’m sincerely hoping that this is the start of an upward swing for them!
Heh yeah they deserve a bit of peace, before the inevitable over-reach and ensuing crisis. Yeah they were so wrapped up in blaming themselves, it was a wonder that they managed to actually talk it out. Thank you so much! I’m really glad you enjoyed it 🙂
So happy to see this updated! I missed it. Some of Belle’s struggles really resonate with me; the anxiety, depression, and agoraphobia.
Things might still be a little rocky between them, but they’ve talked at least, figured somethings out. And they were hugging in the end, so ::whew::! They are perfect for one another; he is so driven that he can help her work through some of her issues; and she can help him mellow out and get a few hobbies. And Neal, bless him, such a good guy!
Yeah, sorry for the wait. That wasn’t intentional and every time I post a chapter I swear I’m going to do better, and then it’s another month again. I’m glad you still liked the chapter! Yup them talking was a turning point. I agree that Neal means well. He has his biases, and made some mistakes, and he can be quite unreasonable where his dad is concerned, but that doesn’t mean he’s not a decent guy. He’s just human. Anyway, thank you so much! 🙂
OH MY GOD IT’S LIKE Painting Layers of Love by stillsearching47!!!!! EEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!! (*and if she has a Tumblr somebody PLEASE tell me what it is cause she NEEDS to see this SO much HNNNNNGGGGGGG)
Wow yeah that definitely looks like Belle or Gold’s front door. All the flowers are very atmospheric and that old lamp-post is brilliant. The cottages are kinda remote for that but perhaps in the nearby village? It’s definitely the right feel. Thank you so much @the1ultimatefan for thinking of my fic and thanks @beastlycheese for helping out 🙂
*clears throat* Unaccustomed though I am to admitting fault, I am forced to agree. I could definitely have handled that better. My timing was atrocious, well-intentioned but *snorts* we all know how intentions are meaningless. I’ve just discovered I have Belle’s shoes to return. I will knock and return them and apologize for my poor timing. Undoubtedly, that will be the last we see of one another.
#of course it’s not the last you’ll see of one another#oh gold you have no idea
I don’t know what to think right now. Yesterday was just all too much.
#I know not a very good answer but I don’t want to spoil the next chapter#I promise chapter eight will happen as soon as possible#I just need to finish my RSS fic first
Synopsis: Belle French lives alone and she likes it that way. She’s lived alone ever since the terrible car accident which killed her mother and claimed her eyesight. Belle spends her days painting, in complete solitude, until one day she wakes up and hears movement outside. Somebody has moved into the cottage next door. She had grown comfortable in her solitary existence until Mr Gold crashes into her life. Now her future is uncertain, like a blank canvas, waiting for her to apply the paint and decide what kind of story she is creating.
Note: I’m going to echo Gold here – intentions are meaningless. This should have been updated a week ago last Friday but life happened. Anyway, in this chapter there’s a prompt from @rowofstars about Gold resisting getting called back into work which has rather unfortunate consequences. I’m intending to post Chapter Eight next Tuesday to fix it. Anyway, in the meantime – enjoy!
Banner by the incredibly amazing @rowofstars thank you so much! 🙂
Belle bit her
lip and wished the ground would swallow her up. She obviously couldn’t see
Nick’s expression, and she couldn’t deduce anything from his breathing. She
really wished he would say something as she was really regretting her honesty.
Nick had been honest with her, and it had felt like the right thing to do, to
admit that she liked him. However, the spiraling possibilities were really
starting to scare her, and she needed him to say something.
“Nick?” Belle
whispered.
“Sorry
sweetheart, you caught me off guard. I never expected … I never would have
dreamed,” Gold struggled.
“Dad,” Neal
called hesitantly. Belle tensed automatically and felt Nick’s hand curl around
her own. “Is everything ok?”
“Everything’s
fine,” Gold called back quickly. “We can talk about it later. If you could
close the patio doors …”
“And get back
to the garden,” Neal finished. “Alright.”
Like I said in another post, I’ve gone back and revised this chapter thanks to some amazing feedback I had. There’s a net gain of almost 750 words but I did change some stuff as well. Hopefully it makes more sense now 🙂
UGH. I knew Gold was going to fuck up. Things were too good. Neal was great, but this is really one of those things where he needed to caution Gold more than support him. Unfortunately… now it’s all worse. 🙁
Poor Belle. *HOLDS HER FOREVER*
MAKE IT BETTER, SAM. PLEASE????
This is where I could quote A&E and say “it’s always darkest before the dawn” but I would rather not get beaten up 🙂 Heh, I am going to fix it I promise! I just need to get RSS done, Chapter 8 is my first priority after that. Thank you so much for your wonderful comments *hugs you*