I decided yesterday that today would be a day for writing but I had a really bad nightmare and kinda just want a duvet day to banish the world instead.
Seriously I’ve been awake 3 hours and I’m still freaked out.
Author Archives: Sam
Just watched the season 3 episode Past Imperfect of Warehouse 13.
Now I know the Sam stuff was there from the very beginning in season one. It always made me uncomfortable, calling Myka bunny? I mean come on just no. But this episode – the flashbacks – could she have been anymore breathless airhead?
You know I finally get the frustration when it feels like the TV people just threw a guy in there like a “this is fine” sort of frantic rearguard action to cover the gay. I’ve never really felt that before.
If they had made Sam less objectionable then I would be more accepting but it makes me cringe everytime. I think that’s the problem. I can’t buy the relationship as it makes Myka OOC, therefore it doesn’t seem real.
In other news I really wish they would give Jinks more stuff to do. He’s kinda just there and hasn’t made an impact which is a shame (he’s Johnny on Killjoys). Him role playing at the re-enactment was good, let him have fun.
The NaNo Report: Day Ten
Spent the bulk of the day on uni work, doing all the prep for my Reading Texts module on Monday. I was determined to do some writing though because *drum roll* yup it’s that 4thewords thing. There’s a streak element – 444 words a day – and I want to do it!
Having blown a few cobwebs away with fanfic yesterday I decided to dust off my original novel that has been lingering for two years. I finished off a scene that had been laying unfinished since the beginning of the year but didn’t do anything else. It was painful and it took me an hour to get started because with every fiber of my being I wanted to run away.
It’s a WIP, it’s a third in a series, I’m very invested in it and consequently I’m utterly choked by fear. Pulling teeth is an understatement. I kept repeating like a litany to myself that it’s a first draft, that I just have to finish it so I have a complete draft to work with for revision – that this isn’t the end, it’s just the beginning. It’s still damn hard though. There’s so much baggage with this book; so much hope, so much failure, so much need.
Rather than make my catchup total lower, I’ve increased it by failing to reach the daily target but /shrug some days are like that. I wrote something, I broke the ice, and I’m plodding along. There’s a quote pinned to my wall which I think is appropriate here:
“Measure your worth by the dedication to your path, not by your successes or failures.” – Elizabeth Gilbert, Big Magic
I really want my 50k because I’ve been doing this NaNo thing a decade and somewhere along the way my sense of identity got wrapped up in it. It’s important to me but at the end of the day it’s the stories which matter most. I might not get them written as fast as I’d like, and I may never be satisfied with the end result, but I will still get them done.
This isn’t a joyride. It’s the rest of my life. I’m in this writing business for the long haul, wherever the journey takes me.
Words written: 736
Total count: 5,841
The NaNo Report: Day Nine
So this morning I said I decided it was a writing day. How did it go?
Well it went pretty damn well. There were two occasions when I had to stop (first time I was freezing, second time mum talked to me) and both times I struggled to get back into it again. However I did and my total wound up being fairly miraculous given the current state of play.
Words written: 3,417
Total count: 5,105
*falls over* I know right?!?! I mean back in the day I would probably have been less than thrilled with this after a supposed full day of writing but that just proves it’s all a matter of perspective. Yes I can technically write 1-2k an hour. Have I done that in years? Nope. So this is like the new best – actually I like that, I’m going to use this as a top benchmark rather than the old numbers because the old numbers are sooooo unreachable these days.
What did I write? Well I finished the first draft of the Celeb/Fan AU for Ripper. It’s seriously awful (I’m not at all happy with it) so that won’t be getting posted anytime soon but hey “I can fix a bad page, I can’t fix a blank page” so I’ve passed stage one on it at least!
After that I moved onto the post-season two Timeless fic, which will incorporate the two other Garcy prompts Ripper sent me. This is going to be… long /headdesk and as I want to finish it before they actually air the wrap-up movie next month I need to get my skates on.
I’m now just slightly shy of 10k off pace. I do have to actual uni work/chores tomorrow. Ideally I’ll write the new daily pace of 2250 but so long as I write at least 1667 I won’t fall any further behind. *cross fingers*
I’ve decided today is a day of writing.
I will probably regret that tomorrow when I remember the novel I have to read for Monday, the two assignments I have to do, plus all the usual household chores that just repeatedly need doing (why can’t stuff stay clean?).
But for today I’m going to try and put that out of my head, Future!Me will have to deal with that, sucks to be her haha.
I really wish they had done a Warehouse 12 spin-off from Warehouse 13 where HG Wells just owns everybody.
I watched the 3-2-1 episode the other day with mum and she raised an eyebrow “trousers in that age as a woman?” (1890) and I said that was the genius of HG.
HG played on expectations. I suspect in the beginning she might have disguised herself more as a guy when out doing warehouse stuff but soon realised she didn’t have to because people are blind. They would see trousers and wouldn’t look twice so eventually she got more daring, more blatant, daring people to notice but nobody ever looked twice. Nobody ever saw her.
Seriously though I would have watched 10 seasons of HG solving everything like a boss with Wooly as her exasperated sidekick.
The NaNo Report: Day Eight
Hallelujah there were some words!
Today I procrastinated a lot but I eventually did the reading for one of my modules for next week (that took pretty much all day). Then at 5pm I decided it was writing time.
I worked on the Garcy Celeb/Fan AU for Ripper because it’s the thing closest to being finished (so I can cross something off my list). It was like pulling teeth. I’m going to get down on my knees and beg for a beta as I think it’s awful and I can’t put it out into the world like it is BUT that’s a December problem.
Most of today’s words were written at the end as I really, really struggled to get going. However I discovered if I actually use my second monitor life is easier (how do you forget this self?) and also I really am motivated by small numbers ticking down and then ‘just one more’.
Words written: 1540
Total count: 1688
I’ve reached day one’s pace! *cough* on day eight. My word debt is currently 11,645 words which is quite a lot. It’s an extra 530 words a day spread out over the remaining 22 days of the month. That makes for basically 2200 words a day which is more than I’ve written in a day since… quite possibly 2016.
Looking back historically I overcame a 12,747 word debt to win back in 2013 but the situation was different. I really don’t know if I can do it again.
Anyway right now I’m set to finish June 25th 2019 which I’m finding slightly amusing so at least there’s that 🙂
Today I joined 4thewords – a site where you can battle monsters through writing words. Basically it’s like writing sprints of varying lengths and difficulties.
They have a 10 character word limit for usernames so I’m space-merc rather than galactic-pirates as the latter wouldn’t fit.
It does cost once the 30 day free trial is up. Seeing as I only joined today I don’t know if I’ll keep up with it but I figured I’d share so people could either friend me, or try it out for themselves if this is the first they have heard of it 🙂
I did write more words today than I have all month so I’m hoping that’s a good sign heh.
I want to say a thing.
NaNoWriMo isn’t for everyone but that doesn’t make it bad.
Now I could be doing my creative writing lecturers a disservice but I got the distinct impression when I had to meet with them yesterday that NaNo = negative in their eyes. That to them writing lots of words meant nothing, that there was zero benefit in that. That it was beneath them and should be beneath me, not something for ‘serious’ writers.
On one level I can understand their caution as churning out lots of words doesn’t mean someone learns from them BUT in my opinion how can anyone learn without practice? It’s only through the act of doing that someone experiments and finds out what works and what doesn’t.
The biggest bonus to NaNo in my eyes is that it gives people a greater shot at the entire process. Actually finishing something – typing The End – is hard. Looking at a complete draft is different from looking at a partial one, you can see the whole story arc for instance. Then once the first draft is done, there’s the opportunity to start the next part of the process – first stage revision.
NaNo and writing the words is to quote from Chris Baty to put an end to the “one-day novelist” (aka the I’ll write a novel ‘one day’ person) by making one-day today. It’s a tool. It’s not an end goal. It’s very unlikely that at the end of the month people will have an amazing book – because that takes time. What they do have though is an incredible starting point.
Sorry I don’t know why I’m feeling defensive, especially because I’m failing NaNo epically right now so all my waxing lyrical about how it gets stuff completed is bull in my case. I just do feel defensive of NaNo I guess because in my eyes there is a lot to recommend it. It isn’t a machine which churns out crap. It’s a tool for learning, experimentation and to open up opportunities into other realms of the writing process.
It’s what you make of it.
FIRST DRAFT
it’s a first draft
FIRST DRAFT
do you have that yet?
Honestly writing is like pulling teeth right now and I think it’s because I’ve a) forgotten how to concentrate and b) suffocating myself as I’m cringing at every single word which means no wonder the words aren’t flowing – I’m scaring them away!
It’s a FIRST DRAFT self, ok? First Draft! You can fix it later but you can’t fix what you don’t have. Please, pretty please, please with bells on, actually just write the damn thing.