I can’t remember where this line came from. It was in a story I read a decade or so ago and it was something like.

“He picked up the book and his eyes automatically started to glaze over, but the impulse to master the material was stronger.”

I don’t know, I’m just feeling that right now.

I’m battling my impatience because what I want to do takes time. I need to put in the work. I can’t just blitz through it and it’ll be done. We’re talking months rather than weeks, probably more like a year or more.

But I want to do it.

I need to think about how to manage it. Maybe I need to schedule my time a little better. Decide on how much I’m doing per day, or what I want to achieve, or maybe a little of both.

I think I also need to continue with my own personal projects as well. Like I had sort of thought to myself that there are these drawings I want to do of Seven and Raffi, I had thought that I would wait to do them until I had more skill – buuuuuut if it takes a year I don’t want to wait that long. I want to do my drawings of them NOW while I’m super passionate about it.

Time. That’s what it comes down to, finding the time and finding the balance. I don’t like to choose, I like to do everything, and I don’t like to admit that’s maybe not possible. Frustrating. But something to think about.