How do people exercise? I mean, seriously, how do you do it? What kind of strange magic do you possess and can I have some?
I’m a chubby ducky and need to trim down, but I have this complete mental block whereby I can’t join a gym because I have never been to one before and I’m so incredibly scared of looking like an idiot. How do you make that first step and go in and ask how to work a machine-that-I-don’t-even-know-what-it-is-called-and-looks-like-it-could-strangle-me? How do you deal with all the super-toned super-thin gym bunnies looking at you and laughing at you because you’re on the lowest setting of this unnamed-and-terrifying-machine? How do you deal with the epic fear of crushing public humiliation?
Same thing applies to running (because other people will see me and therefore laugh at me) and joining exercise classes (because ditto).
I feel like I need to lose a stone before I even start exercising just to save face. I have much respect for not-stick-thin people who go to the gym and I offer you many high fives.
I am very unfit and I’m also very short. In the past when I went to the gym and went on the treadmill, I would have it set on speed 6, and I could only keep that up at first for about 20 seconds and I would be gasping for breath and have to take it down to speed 2 or 3. Then someone would come next to me and speed 6 would be their walking pace and speed 11 or something would be their running pace. So I get it.
Basically go when the gym is quiet and when it’s only the “serious” people because they don’t give a damn what anyone else does. When I went I got up at 7am and went for when it opened. Everyone was too busy getting on with their workout before they went to work, to look twice at me. I know that sounds strange, to go when it’s the “fit people” time but trust me I did go later in the day once and that’s when the “housewives” were there and they are the ones that look at you, and giggle and gossip.
When you originally sign up, they give you a tour of the gym and explain stuff. Though to be honest the machines all have instructions and it’s not that hard to figure out, especially if you don’t use the fancy programs. I could never use the fancy programs because I wasn’t fit enough. I had to adjust the speed etc. manually.
Take an MP3 player, headphones and work out an exercise plan before you go. Keep records of everything you do, and incrementally increase it after a couple of weeks. Rinse and repeat. Basically move with purpose and everyone will ignore you.
I would stay clear of the classes until you feel more confident. Exercising alone means no judgement, you are only competing against yourself. There’s no concern for embarrassment because only you know what you are attempting to do that day. I could never have gone to the gym with anyone else, it’s something I could only do solo. Just following my plan, keeping my head down, getting on with it and yeah ignoring everyone.
You can do it!