Five year plans are dangerous.

I got whacked with a bat and fell to my knees, my lungs wheezing, when I realised in five years I will be FORTY!

Like nooooo thank you.

I don’t even feel twenty yet thank you very much.

I think my brain got frozen at 19 and part of me is still stuck there. Being forty is just impossible. My mum is forty – not me!

Honestly the shit the new year makes us think about.